1.Bedrock Anthem
Sometimes i feel
Like i need a vacation
Sometimes i feel
Like i wanna go
To the city of cavemen
The city of bedrock
I'd be a flinstone
Now i'll tell you why...
Well, i've got i've got a woman named wilma
Well, i've got i've got a baby named pebbles
Well, i've got i've got a doggy named dino
We do a little bowling and we drink a little vino
Well, i've got a little buddy, barney rubble
Got a neighbor by the name of barney rubble
He's a midget but he makes a lot of trouble
Doesn't like to shave, he got caveman stubble
Me and barney, loyal order water buffalo
Lodge brothers, loyal order water buffalo
There's a handshake everybody gotta know
How come grand poo-bah always gotta run the whole show？
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
I get by on all my prehistoric knowhow
Betty and barney got a baby named bamm-bamm
Little pebbles is his number one fan
He's the strongest toddler in the whole land
Tear your arm off if he shakes your hand
Got a car, gonna push it with my feel now
Gonna take my family out to eat now
Jumbo ribs at the drive-in can't be beat now
Made from brontosaurus, baby, not a moo-cow
Wanna chill with a sabretooth tiger
Wear a loincloth, natural fiber
Be the first rolling stone subscriber
Got a pterodactyl for a windshield wiper
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Don't know what it means but i say it anyhow
Luck me, workin' down in the gravel put
Movin' rocks, on a big dinosaur i sit
Mr. slate gets mad and he throws a fit
Pull the birdie's tail, everybody knows it's time to quit
I realize i'm living in the stone age
No fax, no cellular phone-age
Pick my teeth with a dinosaur bone-age
Liftin' heavy boulders every day for my wage
Barney rubble, laughin' like a hyena
Barney rubble, what a little weiner
Where's wilma？ anybody seen her？
Got a baby elephant vacuum cleaner
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
2.Cable Tv
I used to think my life was so empty
I used to think life was passin' me by
Well, i was just about ready
To curl up and die
But then one day i got a visit
From the cable company
Well, they hooked me up and plugged me right in
And now i got cable tv
And now i get to watch the stock report in korean
Midget wrestling on channel three
It costs me fifty bucks a month just to see 'em
Yeah, but that's all right with me
I got cable tv (cable tv)
Cable tv (cable tv)
Oh, eighty-three channels of ecstasy
I love my cable tv, yeah
I love my cable tv
I got the siamese faith healer's network
The news and weather from peru
I got celebrity hockey
The racketball channel too
Bugs bunny direct from atlanta
Mr. wizard is on at five
I got a satellite dish on the trunk of my car
So i can watch mtv while i drive
I'm talkin' 'bout real quality programs
The kind you just can't get for free
Now i never wanna leave my apartment
'cause there's just so much for me to see
On my cable tv (cable tv)
Cable tv(cable tv)
Well, if you need to find me
You know where i'll be
Watchin' my cable tv, yeah
Watchin' my cable tv
'cause i love my cable tv, yeah
I love my cable tv
My friends are gettin' kinda worried
They think i'm turning into some kinda freak
Oh, but they're just jealous 'cause i've seen porky's
Twenty-seven times this week
On my cable tv (cable tv)
Cable tv (cable tv)
Yeah, the greatest thing that's ever happened to me
I love my cable tv, yeah
I love my cable tv
Well, i got to have cable tv, yeah
I need my cable tv
Well, i love, i love my cable tv (tv)
Got to have cable tv (tv)
Well, i got to have my cable tv, yeah (tv)
Can't live without my cable tv
Well, i said, got to have some cable tv (tv)
I've got to have my cable tv
I said cable tv, yeah (tv)
Got to have cable tv
3.Frank's 2000' TV
Risin' above the city, blocking out the noonday sun
It dwarfs the mighty redwoods and it towers over everyone
I still remember when that delivery truck came down our block
What a lucky guy, i hear he got the last one in stock
And the neighbors are just green
They say, 'that's the biggest screen we've ever seen!'
It's frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
Everbody come and see(frank's 2000' tv)
Frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
That's frank's remote control, you can look, but don't touch it,
please
'cause frank's the one in charge and he decides what everybody
sees
The picture's crystal clear and everything is magnified
Robert deniro's mole has got to be ten feet wide
Everybody in the town
Can hear those 90,000 watts of dolby sound
And i'm mighty proud to say
Now i can watch 'the simpsons' from thirty blocks away
On frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
Everybody come and see (frank's 2000' tv)
Frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
Everybody come and see (frank's 2000' tv)
I'm gonna get one of my own real soon
It's like having a drive-in movie in your own living room
Whoa, hey now... hey now na na na now
Hey now... hey now na na now
Frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
Everybody come and see (frank's 2000' tv)
Frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
Got a two year warranty on parts and labor
Frank's 2000' tv (frank's 2000' tv)
Frank's 2000' tv
4.Here's Johnny
here's johnny
There he goes, he drives me crazy
When he says...(hee-eere's johnny!)
That's his job, it's so amazing
All he says is...(hee-eere's johnny!)
I never miss a moment when he's on the tube
His being there has made my life worth living
The chills run down my spine
Each time he says that line
'here's johnny!' he says, and laughs in his special way
'...johnny!' he says, you know i love him
'here's johnny!' he says, and 'second fiddle' is his game
Ed mcmahon's his name...all right
Dressed so fine, he's such a cool dude
Hear him say...(hee-eere's johnny!)
Watch him selling beer and dog food
Hear him say...(hee-eere's johnny!)
I got a letter from him just the other day
He said, 'you may already be a winner!'
A trooper to the end
A clydesdale's best friend
'here's johnny!' he says, and laughs in his special way
'...johnny!' he says, you know i love him
'here's johnny!' he says, and that's the way he gets his pay
What a living
Oh...(here's johnny! here's johnny!) wo-o-o, no
(here's johnny! here's johnny!) no no no no no no, i don't
believe it
(here's johnny!) he says, and everytime it's just the same
Ed mcmahon's his name
A very special guy...all right
He's on every night
Can't change the channel
When he's sitting on the panel
(hee-eere's johnny!)
There he goes, he gives me goose bumps
When he says...(hey-o-hey-hey-o!)
'here's johnny!' he says, and laughs in his special way
'...johnny!' he says, you know i love him
'here's johnny!' he says, that seems to be his claim to fame
Ed mcmahon's his name
5.I Can't Watch This
I can't watch this. i can't watch this
I can't watch this. i can't watch this
My my my my tv makes me so bored
Makes me say, oh my lord
What is this garbage here？
Wanna cover my eyes and plug my ears
It sucks, and that's no lie
It's about as much fun as watching paint dry
Lowers my iq one notch
And that's the reason why, uh, i can't watch
I told you homeboy... i can't watch this
Yeah, nothin' but trash and you know...
I can't watch this
Poke out my eyes, man... i can't watch this
Yo, gimme that remote control... i can't watch this
Talkin' 'bout sick shows
Tere's america's funniest home videos
I can't believe my eyes
When i see the kind of stuff that wins first prize
Somebody's poor old mom
Falls down off the roof, lands right on the lawn
Face first on a rake
I hear they've got it on the seventeenth take
That's funny as a kick in the crotch
And that kind of show, uh, i can't watch
Yo, i told you... i can't watch this
Change the channel now, man... i can't watch this
Yo, pass the tv guide here, sucker... i can't watch this
Cosby show and rosanne
Think i've taken 'bout as much as i can
Judge wopner, oh my
You gotta be rainman to like this guy
Thirtysomething is alright
If you like hearing yuppies whining all night
Can't stand twin peaks
Wish they'd lynch those donun-eatin' freaks
Thos siskel ＆ ebert bums
Oughta go home and sit on their thumbs
That's word because you know... i can't watch this
I can't watch this
Break it down!
Here's-how-to-order-money-back-guarantee-removes-tough-stains-fast-it-tastes-more-like-fresh-peanuts-they-keep-going-and-going-don't-hate-me-because-i'm-beautiful-could-be-dandruff-our-prices-ar
Aaaane!!!
Stop! prime time!
I'm pretty sure i'll be sick
If i have to watch another stupid pet trick
Or that guy with the real flat hair
That goes 'woof woof woof' and waves his fist in the air
Or those weird talk shows
About transsexual nazi eskimos
They're rude, crude and vile
Just for a minute let's flip down the dial
Flip, flip, flip... yeccch, i can't watch this
Look man... i can't watch this
I can't take this torture no more, i can't...
I can't watch this
Pay the bills, station break
Break it down!
Operators-are-standing-by-cubic-zirconium-necklace-you're-soaking-in-it-and-our-fabulous-swimsuit-issue-when-you've-got-a-headache-this-big-this-is-your-brain-on-drugs-i've-fallen-and-i-can't-ge
!
Stop! cable time!
Hbo and playboy, showtime and mtv
I might like 'em more after my lobotomy
Now why did i ever pay for this junk？
I hooked up eighty channels and each one stunk
Just brainless blood and guts, and mindless t ＆ a
It's awful, it's putrid, it's crummy, it's stupid, gonna throw
my set away
I can't watch this. i can't watch this
I can't watch this. yeah... i can't watch this
I told you... can't watch this
Too hip, can't watch this
Get me outta here... can't watch this
6.I Lost On Jeopardy
Oh-oh-oh-oh
I was there to match my intellect on national tv
Against a plumber, oh, and an architect, both with a phd
I was tense, i was nervous, i guess it just wasn't my night
Art fleming gave the answers
Oh, but i couldn't get the questions right, -ight, -ight
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
Well, i knew i was in trouble now
My hope of winning sank
Oh, 'cause i got the daily double now
And then my mind went blank
I took potpourri for one hundred
And then my head started to spin
Well, i'm givin' up don pardo
Just tell me now what i didn't win, yeah, yeah
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
That's right, al--you lost. and let me tell you what you didn't
win： a twenty colume set of the encyclopedia international, a
case of turtle wax, and a yeard's supply of rice-a-roni, the san
fra
O treat. but that's not all. you also made yourself look like a
jerk in front of millions of people. you brought shame and
disgrace to your family name for generations to come. you don't
get to
Back tomorrow. you don't even get a lousy copy of our home game.
you're a complete loser!
Don't know what i was thinkin' of
I guess i just wasn't too bright
Well, i sure hope i do better
Next weekend on the price is right, -ight, -ight
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby
7.Money For Nothing／beverly Hillbillies
Beverly
Beverly hillbillies
Huh, now lookie here people
Listen to my story
A little story 'bout a man named jed
You know something？
That poor mountaineer
They say he barely kept his family fed
Now, let me tell you
One day he was shootin'
Old jed was shootin' at some food
When all of a sudden right up from the ground, there
Well, there came a bubblin' crude
Oil that is well, maybe you call it black gold or texas tea
He gonna move next to mr. drysdale and be a beverly hillbilly...
Before you know it, all the kinfolk are-a-sayin'
Yeah, buddie, move away from there
That little clampet got his own cement pond
That little clampet, he's a millionaire
Now, everyone said californie
Is the place that you oughta be
We got to load up this here truck now
We got to move to beverly
Hills, that is
Swimming pools
Move-a-move-a-movie stars
Huh
Lookit that, lookit that
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
Y'all come back now, y'hear？
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
8.Ricky
R：hey lucy, i'm home
L：oh ricky, you're so fine
L：you're so fine you blow my mind
L：hey ricky, hey ricky
R： oh lucy, you're so fine
R： you're so fine you blow my mind
R： hey lucy, hey lucy
L： oh ricky, you're so fine
L： you play your bongos all the time
L： hey ricky, hey ricky
R： oh lucy, you're so fine
R： how i love tyo hear you whine
R： hey lucy
L： hey ricky
L： you always play your conga drums, you think you got the right
L： you wake up little ricky in the middle of the night
L： stop shakin' your maraccas now and just turn out the light
ricky
R： i'm sick of fred and ethel always comin' over here
R： 'cause fred eats all our pretzel sticks and then he spills
his beer
R： why don't you serve your cassarole and make them disappear
lucy
L： oh ricky, what's a girl like me supposed to do
L： you really drive me wild when you sing your babaloo
R： oh lucy, you're so dizzy, don't you have a clue
R： well, here's to you lucy
R： i love you too lucy, too lucy, let's babaloo lucy
L： hey ricky
L： you're always playin' at the club, you never let me go
L： i'm beggin' and i'm pleadin' but you always tell me no
L： oh, please honey please, let me be in your show ricky, wah
R： you always burn the roast and you drop the dishes too
R： you iron my new shirt and you burn a hole right through
R： you're such a crazy redhead i just don't know what to do lucy
L： oh ricky
L： what a pity, don't you understand
L： that every day's a rerun and the laughter's always canned
R： oh lucy
R： i'm the latin leader of the band
R： so here's to you lucy
R： let's babaloo lucy, too lucy
R： everybody rumba!
R： ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
9.Talk Soup
I dated siamese twins
I slept with bigfoot, too
Get me on sally jesse
Put me on donahue
'cause i wanna tell the world about it
Right now
My dog's a narcoleptic
My mom's a circus freak
I gotta get a spot on
Geraldo's show this week
'cause i wanna tell the world about it
Right now
I'm just an anorexic codependant bingo addict
Stripper born without a chin
And i'm only comfortable talking about it
When the whole wide world is listening in
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen
to me
My wife ran off with elvis
My boss shaved off my hair
I've got a thing for poodles
And rubber underwear
And i wanna tell the world about it
Right now
I had a close encounter
I never chew my food
I got eleven nose jobs
I yodel in the nude
And i wanna tell the world about it
Right now
I'm just a cross-dressin' alcoholic neo-nazi
Porno star, as you may have guessed
And i'm really gonna feel a whole lot better
If you let me get this thing off my chest
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen
to me
I'm just your average schizophrenic nymphomaniac
Albino go-go dancer, you see
Nothin' so bad that i can't share it
With a billion friends on national tv, whoa...
I have no genitalia
I sold my kids for cheese
I love my blow up doll, so
Bring out those cameras, please
'cause i wanna tell the world about it
Right now
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen
to me
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen
to me
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen
to me
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen
to me
10.The Brady Bunch
You can watch mr. rogers
You can watch three's company
And you can turn on fame or the nelywed game
Or the addams family
I say, you can watch barney miller
And you can watch your mtv
And you can watch 'till your eyes fall out of your head
That'll be ok with me
And you can watch (tv)
You can watch johnny carson
You can watch phil donahue
And you can use tv guide to help you decide
With capsulized review
Say, you can watch 60 minutes
Even captain kangaroo
But there's only one set, so what ever you watch
Well, you know i gotta watch it too
Say, give it up, give it up, television's taking its toll
That's enought, that's enough, gimme the remote controll
I been nice, i been good, please don't do this to me
Turn it off, turn it off, i don't want to have to see
The brady bunch
Not the brady bunch
Well, the brady bunch
Yeah, the brady bunch
It's the story of a lovely lady
Who was bringing up three very lovely girls
All of them had hair of gold, like their mother
The youngest one in curls
It's a story of a man named brady
Who was busy with three boys of his own
They were four men living all together
Yeah, but they were all alone
Until the one day, one day when the lady met the fellow
And they knew, and they knew it was much more than a hunch
Then they knew this group must somehow form a family
That's the way, that's the way, that's the way they all became
The brady bunch
Well, the brady bunch
Yeah, the brady bunch
Well, the brady bunch
Oh, it's the brady bunch
It's the brady bunch
Oh, the brady bunch, yeah
Oh, the brady bunch
It's the brady bunch
Well, it's the brady bunch
Well, it's the brady bunch
Well, it's the brady bunch
It's the brady bunch
11.Uhf
Put down your remote control
Throw out your tv guide
Put away your jacket
There's no need to go outside
Don't you know that we control the horizontal
We control the verticle, too
We gonna make a couch potato out of you
That's what we gonna do now
Don't change the channel
Don't touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Don't worry 'bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf
Disconnect the phone and leave the dishes in the sink
You better put away your homework
Prime time ain't no time to think
All you do is make yourself a tv dinner
Press your face right up against the screen
We gonna show you thangs you ain't ever seen
If you know what i mean, now
Don't change the channel
Don't touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Don't worry 'bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf
You can watch us all day
You can watch us all night
You can watch us any time that you please
You can sit around and stare at the picture tube
'till your brain turns into cottage cheese
Well, now
Don't change the channel
Don't touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Don't worry 'bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all (we got it all) on uhf (we got it)
(we got it) we got (we got it) it all (we got it) on uhf (we got
it all)
We got it all on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all (we got it all) on uhf (on uhf)
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all (we got it all) on uhf (we go it)
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf
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